Lazy Program Begone!!

I was joking around with my massage therapist today about how I've been on the "Lazy Program" and I think it's time I got off of it. Lazy with nutrition, sleep, rest, and exercise. Yeah, I think I've overdone that program. We even joked around about the infomercial for the Lazy Program. "You want another body part to start hurting today for no reason? Try the Lazy Program. Do absolutely NOTHING and see absolute weight gain and feel a new pain every day! Yes, the Lazy Program can be yours today!" And yes, that was funny but it's so pathetically accurate that in a way it's kind of not so funny. Know what I mean?

I don't know what my problem is!!! I really don't. I wrote my TRUTH blog on Saturday and then I proceeded to just completely fall from grace! Well, not really, but what is my problem?!? I keep telling myself to be patient and yada yada but that's really not happening. For whatever reason I absolutely DON'T want to workout at all! I mean, I'll run the stairs with my BF and I'll go rollerblading any day and I did try Zumba for the first time the other day but in general I really don't want to workout at all! Not even a smidgen of a desire. And weights?!? Nope, no desire at all. None whatsoever. None. Zilch. Nada. Zip! You get the idea!

And then I'm stuck in a vicious cycle because I don't feel like cooking or making anything to eat that's not cooked in about 2 seconds or somehow pre-made. And then I feel not so good because that kind of food doesn't sustain me or make me feel good. It DOES however make me feel bloated and lazy, joints feel swollen and achy, body feels puffy, don't sleep as well, feel stuffed up, etc. etc. And all that makes me feel like not working out. So I don't work out and then I don't eat right and round and round and round we go...where we'll stop, nobody knows!!!!

So I had to call in for some help. After all, what are friends for? Well, my friend told me that I just have to do something because if I think I feel bad, add 4-5 more months on top of that and THEN how will you feel?!? Not to mention the weight you will gain between now and then. I give my friend credit. She'll hand it to me straight. Now keep in mind that we don't live in the same state so she hasn't actually seen me but she knows what I'm talking about. I appreciate that kind of honesty though. And she's absolutely right. Sh!t or get off the pot, right? Yep! That's right.

All this bitching and moaning really isn't helping anyone but I can't seem to find it anywhere. My motivation, that is. So, what's a girl to do? Well, ask Nike says "Just do it!" Yep, that's right. Just do the darn thing! I guess as much as I want to let my body tell me what to do, it really doesn't matter what it tells me if I don't listen. And I haven't been listening. So, I'm off on yet another journey and this time I have to force myself to do something until it once again becomes habit. I fell of the wagon. Yes, it's true. And for the first time in my life I didn't feel like working out. AT ALL! I don't remember a time before in my life when I didn't want to work out. So unlike me. I was beginning to question if I was depressed. But I don't think I am. I just feel highly unmotivated so I'm going to force feed myself a little exercise and force myself to eat better. I can only do that for now. I don't expect miracles but I do expect to get back to doing something. I wouldn't feel good if today were my last day of my life. And I have to go with that idea. I don't want to feel like some kinda slouch on my last day of living! That wouldn't be something I'd be proud of. So I must do something. And so I will. Stay tuned.

“When things go wrong, you'll find they usually go on getting worse for some time; but when things once start going right they often go on getting better and better.” ~C.S. Lewis